It’s the season for weddings. I know this for two reasons, one because my rooms are opposite Bramhall Methodist church and I often see the happy throng gathered outside the church eagerly anticipating the bride’s arrival. Also, I have the privilege of being my friend Mike’s best man in September.
I have been best man before, and it can be a stressful experience, organising the stag party, practical things on the day and then the dreaded speech! I have spent many a night struggling with the words and fretting whether or not my jokes will be regarded as funny or will the bride’s mother not approve. I must say I am far more relaxed about the affair this time around, probably because of what I do for a living and perhaps my age!
The fear of public speaking is the most common ‘phobia’ in the UK, followed by…yes you guessed it the fear of spiders. Most of my hypnotherapy clients report a fear of public speaking which usually boils down to a fear of being the focus of attention or being judged. I am pleased to report, that in my experience, this is something that can be easily resolved through a couple of sessions of hypnotherapy. As with all fears, it is stored in our subconscious, and the best way of dealing with such issues is simply to talk, persuade, cajole the subconscious mind to drop off the fear. Your local hypnotherapist can do this; I do this almost constantly from my offices in Bramhall, Cheshire.
Now as we know gents, us guys are bit-part players on the day. Really it’s all about the bride (and her Mum). They want to look their best on the big day and we at Calm Minds can offer hypnotherapy for those who want to perhaps loose a few pounds and fit into that stunning dress. Hypnotherapy for weight loss is the most popular type of therapy that I carry out. I have written on it extensively before, but it’s not about diets, diets don’t work. It’s about changing habits and dealing with emotions that lead to weight gain.
Enjoy your day, and be happy together (that’s all about communication in the broadest sense). If you need help with nerves around speeches or want to feel better on the special occasion, please call me at Calm Minds in Bramhall.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Counselling and Labels
I have been asked to ‘blog’ about counselling. I am always hesitant to write on such issues due to client confidentiality.
Well I suppose that could be a subject for discussion for starters? When I see a counselling client for the first time they are usually anxious and concerned that they are meeting a new ‘therapist’ for the first time. “Will he tell someone about what we are talking about” may be a thought crossing their mind?
The British Association of Counsellors and Psychotherapists, of which I am a member, are very clear on client confidentiality with strong ethical guidelines, (visit www.bacp.co.uk for more information on this). Basically counsellors are trained to keep counselling client information extremely confidential.
We have a legal obligation to let the relevant authorities know if we believe our client is involved in terrorism or drug trafficking (the money laundering aspect). Otherwise, the information passed on remains confidential, even when we discuss counselling client issues with our supervisor the client is always anonymous. Even down to bumping into a client in Tescos around Bramhall or Stockport, I will normally agree beforehand that I will not ‘let on’ unless they do so first.
I also contract beforehand around clients’ safety and those around them, particularly children, and confidentiality may be broken if someone is in danger.
The other aspect of counselling that I feel that I can talk about in a general sense is that of ‘labels’. Labels can be useful in a profound way and give a sense of normality or “this is why I am like this!” and on a practical level they can be used to provide support and assistance including financial help. Although, I find counselling a number of clients who come from all over the North West as a ‘de-labelling’ process.
Often a client will walk in with a metaphorical sandwich board around their necks and introduce themselves as “I have PTSD”, “I am depressed”, “I suffer from OCD”, or even “I am mad”.
In such circumstances it can take a period of counselling and de-labelling to get to the person underneath who is reacting in a very human way to life and outside events. It can be the source of great warmth, satisfaction and hope to see the human without the label, the authentic person they were always meant to be appear in front of me. One thing that connects all my counselling clients, I believe, is they start with a since in inauthentic-ness. Not feeling ‘themselves’, something ‘not quite right’.
I enjoy the process of counselling that allows them or encourages them to become them.
Well I suppose that could be a subject for discussion for starters? When I see a counselling client for the first time they are usually anxious and concerned that they are meeting a new ‘therapist’ for the first time. “Will he tell someone about what we are talking about” may be a thought crossing their mind?
The British Association of Counsellors and Psychotherapists, of which I am a member, are very clear on client confidentiality with strong ethical guidelines, (visit www.bacp.co.uk for more information on this). Basically counsellors are trained to keep counselling client information extremely confidential.
We have a legal obligation to let the relevant authorities know if we believe our client is involved in terrorism or drug trafficking (the money laundering aspect). Otherwise, the information passed on remains confidential, even when we discuss counselling client issues with our supervisor the client is always anonymous. Even down to bumping into a client in Tescos around Bramhall or Stockport, I will normally agree beforehand that I will not ‘let on’ unless they do so first.
I also contract beforehand around clients’ safety and those around them, particularly children, and confidentiality may be broken if someone is in danger.
The other aspect of counselling that I feel that I can talk about in a general sense is that of ‘labels’. Labels can be useful in a profound way and give a sense of normality or “this is why I am like this!” and on a practical level they can be used to provide support and assistance including financial help. Although, I find counselling a number of clients who come from all over the North West as a ‘de-labelling’ process.
Often a client will walk in with a metaphorical sandwich board around their necks and introduce themselves as “I have PTSD”, “I am depressed”, “I suffer from OCD”, or even “I am mad”.
In such circumstances it can take a period of counselling and de-labelling to get to the person underneath who is reacting in a very human way to life and outside events. It can be the source of great warmth, satisfaction and hope to see the human without the label, the authentic person they were always meant to be appear in front of me. One thing that connects all my counselling clients, I believe, is they start with a since in inauthentic-ness. Not feeling ‘themselves’, something ‘not quite right’.
I enjoy the process of counselling that allows them or encourages them to become them.
